I cant take the smell, the constant whining, crying and begging, the accidents and just the overrall attitude of this king dog. I think it helped to hear from someone else not in the relationship how ridiculous he was being basically choosing the dog over your significant other. Does your pet need better training? You are ripping away something that they are bonded to, a hobby that they like, a fun animal that they enjoy. Its been 6 weeks now, and I still sob. The dog drives me crazy. Hes constantly in the kitchen looking for food to eat! She made arrangements for her mother to take the dog when she came out to visit last week. I do like her but her constant neediness and his inability to change anything about it is upsetting me so much. We are so different, but we mesh so well at the same time. Of course, no problem. I cant relax in the lounge room because of dog flatulence and I am frowned upon for commenting about the smell. If IT doesnt go,he cant bare to leave IT ALL alonee. Im tired of being told wait till you have kids. Spend the $50-100 to see a trainer. I mean, it is that too but it isnt. Just changed some psychology in my way of thinking and its not that important. I had ran inside to go grab a towel. Well I was floored when I heard this has she says one thing like how can you get rid of the puppies and then say something like above. Look the dog fanatics are crazed control freaks who cannot exist with ordinary people and use the dogs, who cannot talk back, to affirm their need for adoration and control. Hes even been around my parents dogs, including the two big ones before they both died, fussing and playing with the current dogs (three Bichon Frises) so I thought he was happy with dogs and fine around them. Hes quit jobs because he couldnt have the dog with him. Wishing you the best! Get it together. What about a puppy bed next to your guys bed? She continues to talk about this dog like its a person which I have to tell her a dog is not a person or a child, it is an animal. Now it stinks and has nasty hair all over it. He goes back to the other house he would love them. I dont think anyone willingly lets their dog stay in the bed while having sex with their partner I do agree that if the dog is taking up too much space, compromise is in order. My boyfriend was around for the last year and a half of my first dog and during the entire life of my second dog. Regardless the animal was never trained properly and she has no intentions of attempting to do so. I feel that I never had privacy with my husband, with always those dogs around, on the couch, at the kitchen table, while cooking, while being outside, even in the bedroom!! what a pain. Do dogs stick to mating with one partner, and one partner only till death do them part? All i can say is tha, i hope he can find a woman that would put up with being second to dogs. Everyone loves him and he is the most loveable,obedient dog ever. She is a pit bull, but very submissive. How is the lives and wellbeing of YOUR children less important than an animal?!? Dogs do not fail us, we fail the. What magical power does he possess over you? If it werent for having a child with him Id be off out of there as soon as possible. Consult your veterinarian: Its always better to chat with your veterinarian in order to make sure if there is any health-related issue that triggers this lousy behavior. Its recommended not to let him walk off-leash and roam. hi question very similar problem. I live in Germany, so sorry if my gramma isnt so good. I get so mad and my wife just says oh, it is ok, he is old. Its sooo disturbing! NO they are not like kids its not even remotely the same. The guy I am with hates dogs with a bloody passion and I have THREE. he directs his negativity at a 11 month old puppy. The other night I was walking up the stairs and turned around to see my husband lean down and kiss his Lab on the mouth. Cant wear anything dark or I have fur on it. We are supposed to get married next year and this whole dog thing is really starting to question my relationship. Again, fine. hes 14 so it cant go on forever. Here are several tips to minimize the issue. on all of that! I tell him he is making it worse, he reads that same thing and attempts to change his behavior for about a minute. ! I very seriously do not want to live with a dog but I also dont want to take anything away from my girlfriend. After the second year of marriage I began to realize that my wifes focus was more on her dogs than on me. I see no solution to this and feel I must learn to accept the deep sadness in my heart for the sake of my marriage. I have a small dog that I love very much. People who defend the animal to the bitter end kill me. Thanks, My husband got a dog this dog is always up his a%s so one nite I told him he should of married the dog he give that dog a lot of attention and yes it get old. You are ripping away something that they are bonded to, a hobby that they like, a fun animal that they enjoy. Enough to break the marriage? Weve tried other toys, but he destroys and eats them. I want my fiance to be happy again but I also dont want to give up the dog either. Why not question your need to put human needs beneath dogs. I totally agree with you! He treats her the same as yours does his dog. At first, I loved her. But there is none of that. He never ever listens and never obeys! Create an allergy-free area in your home. I have asked many times if we could transition him to the crate or his own bed at night but I always have gotten the statement of people dont get frenchies to put them in a crate, they get them to baby. Even babies need some boundaries and rules! I think it is absolutely disgusting. I want nothing to do with dogs. She is constantly making licking noises, eats my dogs food when my dogs not looking and seems to act like more of a jerk when my boyfriend is gone. But after expressing my feelings towards my partner and them being disregarded, I mostly dont want the dog on the bed because my feelings were tossed to the side. We bought all new furniture for the new house bc we wanted to start everything fresh. Today dogs come to me for affection, not him, and I pet them and enjoy them. Johnston, S. (n.d.). Just a thought. Dog stays off the furniture, gets her own doggie bed for the bedroom, and he sweeps everyday. While I see him mostly on weekends, tonight I claimed sickness because I need peace and quiet. If the brother can afford to take a year off he can afford a kennel or to fly the dog to Europe where there are plenty of dogs. Do a self-evaluation and you may discover that you are stuck in an ever-deepening rut. I am so totally depressed. I brought my dog to the new house. Call Today! I feel bad for thinking this way. For the first 6 months my partner did not mind her sharing the bed. What should I do if my boyfriend is mean to my dog? Also I would recommend getting a male dog, the female are too much and too aggressive and much more work IMO. We love each other very much but this situation is putting a strain on our relationship, he says he doesnt understand as I used to like her at first, I genuinely did but when I realised what it was like to live with her things changed. I dont want to hurt my partner but I know if I say anything the solution may possibly be me moving out. She does only what he has allowed all this time because of how his past relationships have gone. me and my partner both had dogs before we got together , he had 5 me 2 . She is okay sleeping in her bed,but is preferring to sleep up next to me. One time I sat down and my pajama bottoms were wet. Im a germaphob and pretty OCD so you could only imagine how this disturbs me! When they aggressively beg and whine for food and its talking. We once hired a dog-sitter who said shed never sit for them again because their list of needs is so extensive. Like you said, there has to be some give and take and thats what youll have to do if you want to be with him and vice versa so you both and can happy. I live with my boyfriend, his chihuahua and my labradoodle and I cannot stand his dog! She can be a pain in the butt eating loans of bread she sneaks out of our pantry or gets in the yeah if a kid left the garage door open. Who shed heavily and leave pee in the bed and black stuff on the pillows?? When we are at a restaurant eating, I will not even be finished with my food before hes telling me to get a box and take the rest home to the dog. He became like a child to me. Overtime I thought I started liking and loving the pet and that it was growing on me. He got housebroken and crate trained very quickly, and we taught him quite a few commands. I said I would not get married if she slept in the bed. I spent a number of years working in mental health and have gotten feedback from old colleagues, I guess Im really just looking for some anonymous feedback on the situation. Sometimes, your husband/boyfriend may attempt to get rid of the dog because of less compatibility with other pets in the household, which means the dogs aggressiveness to other canines, cats, or any other pet. The thing is we were supposed to be moving in together when he took her on. It is protecting a member of its pack. Yet most of the time something will always get in the way. I had a different situation up until this past weekend. I seriously believe its a sort of mental illness that needs to be addressed! Did I mention that I have to carry him down the stairs & soon will need to carry up the stairs. Last weekend I slept over and was going to make us pancakes for breakfast. Tell that guy to pack his clothes and his dog and cat and GET THE HECK OUT!!!!!! I wonder if there is a certain type of individual that gets these beasts they call dogs? I feel trapped in my own home, every evening and weekend I find myself hiding in my room while he cuddles his dog because I dont want to start another dog fight because it never goes anywhere. You are being reasonable. She would just have to get more bulldogs as she seemed to adore that sickly breed (no such thing as a healthy bulldog) and have a revolving door of bulldogs and loneliness unless she finds someone as obsessed about bulldogs as she is and then they can both have their revolving door of them! Her mother left yesterday and guess whats still in my home. I said I knew he wasnt keen on yappy, exuberant dogs but having seen him fuss and cuddle my parents dogs and my friends puppy, how could I think he was scared of them? He used to send me cat videos, say how cute to them, stroke them when we met one on the streets and so on. Although, I still find I question how a man could prefer a dog to a loving, slender, tender human wife? Run while you can 9 months dont seem like much in the grand scheme of things. People were just reacting to the costuming! I feel like this will eventually be the end to our relationship and I dont know what to do. You might ask your boyfriend to go with you to a shelter, just to look at the cute dogs, or to at least pet a pup if you can't get one. I also find myself sleeping alone every night while the dog sleeps with him because if she sleeps in a kennel she whines because she has a severe case of separation anxiety from him. I even had him get pain pills because one day I noticed her moving from room to room trying to get comfortable. I DISAGREE.. why would you allow your pet to ruin expensive stuff that did not belong to you and pee everywhere? I say that its a cop-out, and those people are deceived into believing that an animal can give them the love that they are searching for, the love that can really only be provided by another human. Its all about me type of person. She has 5 dogs and I cant even begin to describe that situation. He has never had a pet in his life and I am at the point where I would like to add a cat to the equation. Believe me, I did cave on things with my recent ex and that just caused resentment and it will cause it with you. My husband loves our dogs as much as I do. I never in my wildest dreams would have ever thought this would be the cause for unhappiness in my life. Are you in CA? I dont feel like she likes him anymore.. Copyright 2007 - 2023 GoodTherapy, LLC. So, we had a rescue about 3 years old and now a puppy. If you change something it needs to be repeated again and again until they get it. ;-), I think its a big mistake to get involved with someone who has a dog if they hate hate hate fur! Pretty over it all. His dog is so naughty and bratty its driving me insane. I do not mind dogs at all! It just feels that my feelings are brushed off the table and the dogs are priority number 1, while Im his wife. I was loving. Anytime you have anything to eat or drink shes RIGHT THERE. and when I mention it to him, the comments are always, what did they do? When she arrived she was on the couch. The dog is constantly allowed to sleep in the bed with us, which now that I have moved in, Im sleeping in another room my room. I can tell she isnt happy with the dog there, with the way life is. Before my husband came into my life not liking animals was a deal breaker for me. Its just sick sick sick!!! He would be so proud that she never messed indoors, but would hate her for tearing down a coat when left home alone. This is why he isnt allowed in the upstairs area of our house, and hes definitely not allowed on our furniture. Everything she does her licking, her staring, her panting. She happened not to shed, more like a Chia pet with lots of grooming. My partner got a dog, we have been together awhile and I knew he wanted one, one day he came home with a puppy. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. I also told him that we are never close like we used to be, that instead of reaching for me, you reach for the dog. One of them is very dominant and a bully to the other one, most of the time, which can be very frustrating. STOP being so self involved and worrying about your own feelings. But as I sit here and read all the comments and the same scenarios I have been through, one thing does come to mind.communication. Two weeks ago the bomb dropped. I train, strictly, on one commanded at a time, and while the other things are happening I just say no, and take it away. What should I do, I have know where to go and no money bc everything is in her name and bank account. 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Same time brushed off the furniture, gets her own doggie bed for the 6., gets her own doggie bed for the bedroom, and I have a dog.

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